Merry _ _ _ _ _ mas

1196856652_fChoose your poison.

If you haven’t noticed by now, the “Holiday Season” is upon us once again. Bleh.

I don’t pay much attention to right-wing “news” sources, but apparently they’re once again blowing the “War on Christmas” horn, to rally the faithful against the rampaging atheist hordes. Never mind the fact that the atheist hordes are such a small part of the population, or that they’re most likely armed with library books and cappuccinos.

I think fellow non-believing Minnesotan PZ Myers said it best: “The war on Christmas is over. We won.” Some time in recent history, perhaps even in the past decade, Christmas went beyond its Christian origins and became something that everyone can celebrate, like Halloween. It has become less about the birth of Jesus, and more about getting together with friends and family members and share gifts, or even just enjoy their company.

For Christians, it’s naturally still about Jesus, and that’s perfectly ok. No matter what Bill O’Reilly says, nobody* wants to stop you from going to church or putting an angel on your tree or putting one of those little manger scenes on your table (in fact, I’m tempted to do it myself, because they’re pretty neat). In fact, feel free to put a big inflatable light-up Jesus on your front lawn if you want. It’s your property.

But issues arise when these things are set up in public places, and this is where the disagreements (and the only fuel for the War On Christmas fire) appear. Some government and public facilities allow local Christian groups to set up manger scenes on their property during Christmas (and 10 Commandments displays year round, but let’s not bring that up right now), and when the atheists, secularists, Church/State separationists, and non-Christian religious groups make an issue of it, they’re labeled as bad guys.

Once again, it comes down to the First Amendment and how you interpret the Establishment Clause. I personally (and other Church/State separation supporters) support the interpretation by Justice Souter: “government should not prefer one religion to another, or religion to irreligion“. Yes, Christians are the majority in the US, but to favor any religious group over others necessarily restricts the freedoms of people who aren’t part of that group. And that’s bad.

Generally, there are two ways of dealing with the issue of religious displays on public land: either everyone gets to put one up, or nobody does. If you allow a manger scene from the Christians, you have to allow a menorah from the Jews, various Winter Solstice displays from numerous other religions, a bust of L. Ron Hubbard from the Scientologists, a bust of the Flying Spaghetti Monster from the Pastafarians, a disrespectful deliberately inciteful sign from the atheists** (see below), and who knows how many others. Eventually, you may run out of room for displays, you have to deal with vandalism and theft, people will no doubt complain about the placement of the displays…sounds like way more work than it’s worth. I recommend just not allowing religious displays on public ground at all.

I need Halloween costume ideas

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Halloween is about a month away, and I need a good idea for a costume.

Last year, I went as a Bridge Inspector. I actually won the "best costume" award at the Halloween party, but I only won for the idea, because my costume was pretty lousy. I wore what I was wearing that day, but mis-buttoned my shirt. Then I put a hard hat on, backwards. Then I made a nametag labelled "Brige Inspectar" and wore it upside-down. And I went out and spent a whopping $1.49 on a clipboard. Yes, it was a VERY distasteful costume. My aunt actually gave me the idea.

The year before, I went as a birdwatcher. I wore what I was wearing that day, put on a straw hat and binoculars, and that was it. I wore them for about half an hour before I got tired of them and put them away.

The two or three years before THAT, I didn’t have a costume at all. And before that, I went as "Darth Maui", which was just a hawaiian shirt (which I happened to be wearing that day…noticing a pattern?) and a toy lightsaber.

So yea. I need something better.

Some restrictions:

  1. Has to be cheap. Preferably free.
  2. Has to work with my goatee. I’m not shaving.
  3. No makeup. No makeup. No makeup.
  4. I’m a tall/large person. I don’t think I need to say more.

Ok people, think for me. Find me a costume idea!